puns galore
From
George Pope@1:153/757 to
All on Tue Jul 8 08:17:14 2025
My last two ObJokes (ObPuns?) inclusions were lists of puns on a topic.
I found these on a great puns-specific site, via Google:
& more, on avocados, just because I love an avocado shake, or just a scooped out one for breakfast; my wife likes growing them into 2' tall trees then giving them away; ditto for lemons & oranges. . . which all grow surprisingly well up here in Canada, if you're careful in tending them!
Now we're growing Carolina Reaper peppers (hottest in the world, because my son wants o try one!); peppers tis hot, I don't see as food--more for a critter deterrent to keep rats, skunks, &, stray pets, & raccoons out of our backyard.
Keeps mice out of the house, too! Boil a couple hot peppers (currently hottest I have available are Habanero & Ghost) then pour the resulting juice into a spray bottle & soak tops & bottoms of fences & all along the base of the house. Re-apply after every rainstorm & voila! No more pests, except the damned human kind (neighbourhood kids who are as opportunistically larcenous as I was at their ages! Grrr); my wife won't let me run prison quality razor wire across the fence, & I suppose the city wouldn't either. . . /sigh/. . .
Why did the criminal join a book club? He wanted to read about his ôpast crimes!ö
What do you call a thief who loves to play video games? A ôconsoleö-ing bandit! Why did the burglar become a gardener? He wanted to ôplantö his next heist! What do you call a criminal who loves to play chess? A ôcheckö-mate thief! Why did the thief take a job at the bakery? He kneaded the dough! What do you call a criminal who loves to cook? A ôchefö-ter! Why did the burglar always carry a pencil? He wanted to sketch out his plans! What do you call a group of thieves who love to sing? The ôRobö-in Choir! Why did the criminal become a DJ? He wanted to spin some ôheistö-tunes! What do you call a thief who loves to dance? A ôstepö-per! Why did the burglar bring a ladder to the party? He heard the drinks were on the house!
What do you call a criminal who loves to write? A ôpenö-al code expert! Why did the thief go to school? To improve his ôstealö-ing skills! What do you call a criminal who enjoys gardening? A ôweedö-ler! Why did the burglar take a nap? He wanted to catch some ôzÆsö before the big heist!
What do you call a criminal who loves photography? A ôsnapö-per! Why did the thief apply for a job at the library? He wanted to check out some new skills!
What do you call a criminal who loves to run? A ôfastö-er thief! Why did the burglar always wear sunglasses? He wanted to look ôcoolö during the heist!
What do you call a criminal with a great sense of humor? A ôpunö-derful thief!
--- BBBS/Li6 v4.10 Toy-7
* Origin: The Rusty MailBox - Penticton, BC Canada (1:153/757)