• Getting Out of Hand? Newsom Orders Aide to Shoot Off His Ear

    From BTR1701@21:1/5 to All on Sat Aug 23 15:51:44 2025
    https://babylonbee.com/news/getting-out-of-hand-newsom-orders-aide-to-shoot-off-his-ear

    SACRAMENTO, CA — Sources close to Gavin Newsom say that the governor's Trump imitations may be getting a little out of hand after Newsom ordered an aide to shoot off part of his ear.

    Longtime Newsom aide Jackson Price felt things were starting to get weird
    after the governor handed him a rifle and asked him to aim for his earlobe.

    "It's getting a little bizarre now," said Price. "It was kind of a funny joke when Newsom started posting to exTwitter in all caps like Trump does. We all laughed off the new tan and sudden McDonald's obsession. But then he asked me to go with him to a rally, get up on this slightly sloped roof, and literally shoot him in the ear with a high-powered rifle. I feel like he might be taking it a bit too far."

    Gavin Newsom categorically denied any imitation of Donald Trump.

    "That's a YUGE lie. YUGE," said Newsom, waving his hands. "That's only something losers and haters would say, believe me, everyone says so. Now if you'll excuse me, I've got to go start filming on my original new reality show THE TRAINEE, where I will debut my signature catchphrase 'Your employment has been terminated.' It's going to be so tremendous."

    At publishing time, Newsom had announced that he had legally changed his name to Donald J. Trump.

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  • From Adam H. Kerman@21:1/5 to atropos@mac.com on Sat Aug 23 16:20:12 2025
    BTR1701 <atropos@mac.com> wrote:

    https://babylonbee.com/news/getting-out-of-hand-newsom-orders-aide-to-shoot-off-his-ear

    SACRAMENTO, CA - Sources close to Gavin Newsom say that the governor's Trump >imitations may be getting a little out of hand after Newsom ordered an aide to >shoot off part of his ear.

    Longtime Newsom aide Jackson Price felt things were starting to get weird >after the governor handed him a rifle and asked him to aim for his earlobe.

    "It's getting a little bizarre now," said Price. "It was kind of a funny joke >when Newsom started posting to exTwitter in all caps like Trump does. We all >laughed off the new tan and sudden McDonald's obsession. But then he asked me >to go with him to a rally, get up on this slightly sloped roof, and literally >shoot him in the ear with a high-powered rifle. I feel like he might be taking >it a bit too far."

    Gavin Newsom categorically denied any imitation of Donald Trump.

    "That's a YUGE lie. YUGE," said Newsom, waving his hands. "That's only >something losers and haters would say, believe me, everyone says so. Now if >you'll excuse me, I've got to go start filming on my original new reality show >THE TRAINEE, where I will debut my signature catchphrase 'Your employment has >been terminated.' It's going to be so tremendous."

    At publishing time, Newsom had announced that he had legally changed his name >to Donald J. Trump.

    That's hysterical.

    --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05
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  • From moviePig@21:1/5 to All on Sat Aug 23 15:18:38 2025
    On 8/23/2025 11:51 AM, BTR1701 wrote:

    https://babylonbee.com/news/getting-out-of-hand-newsom-orders-aide-to-shoot-off-his-ear

    SACRAMENTO, CA — Sources close to Gavin Newsom say that the governor's Trump
    imitations may be getting a little out of hand after Newsom ordered an aide to
    shoot off part of his ear.

    Longtime Newsom aide Jackson Price felt things were starting to get weird after the governor handed him a rifle and asked him to aim for his earlobe.

    "It's getting a little bizarre now," said Price. "It was kind of a funny joke when Newsom started posting to exTwitter in all caps like Trump does. We all laughed off the new tan and sudden McDonald's obsession. But then he asked me to go with him to a rally, get up on this slightly sloped roof, and literally shoot him in the ear with a high-powered rifle. I feel like he might be taking
    it a bit too far."

    Gavin Newsom categorically denied any imitation of Donald Trump.

    "That's a YUGE lie. YUGE," said Newsom, waving his hands. "That's only something losers and haters would say, believe me, everyone says so. Now if you'll excuse me, I've got to go start filming on my original new reality show
    THE TRAINEE, where I will debut my signature catchphrase 'Your employment has been terminated.' It's going to be so tremendous."

    At publishing time, Newsom had announced that he had legally changed his name to Donald J. Trump.

    Thing is, Newsom's stuff was funny...

    --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05
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  • From super70s@21:1/5 to moviePig on Sun Aug 24 00:57:26 2025
    On 2025-08-23 19:18:38 +0000, moviePig said:

    On 8/23/2025 11:51 AM, BTR1701 wrote:

    https://babylonbee.com/news/getting-out-of-hand-newsom-orders-aide-to-shoot-off-his-ear


    SACRAMENTO, CA — Sources close to Gavin Newsom say that the governor's Trump
    imitations may be getting a little out of hand after Newsom ordered an aide to
    shoot off part of his ear.

    Longtime Newsom aide Jackson Price felt things were starting to get weird
    after the governor handed him a rifle and asked him to aim for his earlobe. >>
    "It's getting a little bizarre now," said Price. "It was kind of a funny joke
    when Newsom started posting to exTwitter in all caps like Trump does. We all >> laughed off the new tan and sudden McDonald's obsession. But then he asked me
    to go with him to a rally, get up on this slightly sloped roof, and literally
    shoot him in the ear with a high-powered rifle. I feel like he might be taking
    it a bit too far."

    Gavin Newsom categorically denied any imitation of Donald Trump.

    "That's a YUGE lie. YUGE," said Newsom, waving his hands. "That's only
    something losers and haters would say, believe me, everyone says so. Now if >> you'll excuse me, I've got to go start filming on my original new reality show
    THE TRAINEE, where I will debut my signature catchphrase 'Your employment has
    been terminated.' It's going to be so tremendous."

    At publishing time, Newsom had announced that he had legally changed his name
    to Donald J. Trump.

    Thing is, Newsom's stuff was funny...

    The governor is trolling a troll, it's impossible to satirize.

    Plus unlike some people he has the good sense/good taste not use
    something as grave as an assassination attempt in an attempt to
    satirize.

    --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05
    * Origin: fsxNet Usenet Gateway (21:1/5)
  • From BTR1701@21:1/5 to All on Sun Aug 24 07:44:24 2025
    On Aug 23, 2025 at 10:57:26 PM PDT, "super70s" <super70s@super70s.invalid> wrote:

    On 2025-08-23 19:18:38 +0000, moviePig said:

    On 8/23/2025 11:51 AM, BTR1701 wrote:


    https://babylonbee.com/news/getting-out-of-hand-newsom-orders-aide-to-shoot-off-his-ear



    SACRAMENTO, CA — Sources close to Gavin Newsom say that the governor's Trump
    imitations may be getting a little out of hand after Newsom ordered an
    aide to
    shoot off part of his ear.

    Longtime Newsom aide Jackson Price felt things were starting to get weird >>> after the governor handed him a rifle and asked him to aim for his earlobe.

    "It's getting a little bizarre now," said Price. "It was kind of a funny >>> joke
    when Newsom started posting to exTwitter in all caps like Trump does. We all
    laughed off the new tan and sudden McDonald's obsession. But then he asked >>> me
    to go with him to a rally, get up on this slightly sloped roof, and
    literally
    shoot him in the ear with a high-powered rifle. I feel like he might be >>> taking
    it a bit too far."

    Gavin Newsom categorically denied any imitation of Donald Trump.

    "That's a YUGE lie. YUGE," said Newsom, waving his hands. "That's only
    something losers and haters would say, believe me, everyone says so. Now if
    you'll excuse me, I've got to go start filming on my original new reality >>> show
    THE TRAINEE, where I will debut my signature catchphrase 'Your employment >>> has
    been terminated.' It's going to be so tremendous."

    At publishing time, Newsom had announced that he had legally changed his >>> name
    to Donald J. Trump.

    Thing is, Newsom's stuff was funny...

    The governor is trolling a troll, it's impossible to satirize.

    Much like the entirety of the 'progressive' Left.

    --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05
    * Origin: fsxNet Usenet Gateway (21:1/5)
  • From moviePig@21:1/5 to All on Sun Aug 24 12:45:03 2025
    On 8/24/2025 1:57 AM, super70s wrote:
    On 2025-08-23 19:18:38 +0000, moviePig said:

    On 8/23/2025 11:51 AM, BTR1701 wrote:

    https://babylonbee.com/news/getting-out-of-hand-newsom-orders-aide-
    to-shoot-off-his-ear

    SACRAMENTO, CA — Sources close to Gavin Newsom say that the
    governor's Trump
    imitations may be getting a little out of hand after Newsom ordered
    an aide to
    shoot off part of his ear.

    Longtime Newsom aide Jackson Price felt things were starting to get
    weird
    after the governor handed him a rifle and asked him to aim for his
    earlobe.

    "It's getting a little bizarre now," said Price. "It was kind of a
    funny joke
    when Newsom started posting to exTwitter in all caps like Trump does.
    We all
    laughed off the new tan and sudden McDonald's obsession. But then he
    asked me
    to go with him to a rally, get up on this slightly sloped roof, and
    literally
    shoot him in the ear with a high-powered rifle. I feel like he might
    be taking
    it a bit too far."

    Gavin Newsom categorically denied any imitation of Donald Trump.

    "That's a YUGE lie. YUGE," said Newsom, waving his hands. "That's only
    something losers and haters would say, believe me, everyone says so.
    Now if
    you'll excuse me, I've got to go start filming on my original new
    reality show
    THE TRAINEE, where I will debut my signature catchphrase 'Your
    employment has
    been terminated.' It's going to be so tremendous."

    At publishing time, Newsom had announced that he had legally changed
    his name
    to Donald J. Trump.

    Thing is, Newsom's stuff was funny...

    The governor is trolling a troll, it's impossible to satirize.

    That theory seems defensible.

    > Plus unlike some people he has the good sense/good taste not use
    something as grave as an assassination attempt in an attempt to satirize.

    Though I'm loath to douse edgy humor, yeah, that occurred to me, too.

    We can allow that the Babylon Bee has done better...

    --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05
    * Origin: fsxNet Usenet Gateway (21:1/5)
  • From Ubiquitous@21:1/5 to moviepig on Sun Aug 24 13:18:45 2025
    moviepig wrote:

    Thing is, Newsom's stuff was funny...



    TROLL-O-METER

    5* 6* *7
    4* *8
    3* *9
    2* *10
    1* | *stuporous
    0* -*- *catatonic
    * |\ *comatose
    * \ *clinical death
    * \ *biological death
    * _\/ *demonic apparition
    * * *damned for all eternity

    --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05
    * Origin: fsxNet Usenet Gateway (21:1/5)